Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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