Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
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