Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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