She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
