she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
