Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
