I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Randomize
