why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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