I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
