I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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