Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
