Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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