he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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