I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
