I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
