He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
