you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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