I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Randomize
