You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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