i may or may not be watching the land before time
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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