i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
