we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize