Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
