My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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