Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
