We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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