How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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