Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
