I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
