marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
