I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
