Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
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