dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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