it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
