have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
