How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
