Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
