i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
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