you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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