whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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