I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
