if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize