New invention idea: vibrating tampons
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize