in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
