dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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