How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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