if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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