weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
