he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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