I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize